


The Broken Princess

by 1TeaBinch



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Physical Therapy, Some Descriptions of Violence, a lot of tears, but it ends up ok, emotional breakdown, lots of pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:55:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23405647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1TeaBinch/pseuds/1TeaBinch
Summary: So a few months ago, I had a brief interaction with @alettepagasus on tumblr about how Adora is full of emotional pain that's been sort of downplayed for a while, and what if she just couldn't handle it anymore? So my angst loving ass decided, I've written a single short fic, I should totally write this.In all honesty, this was supposed to be shorter initially, and then way longer. But i've been running out of brain juice to write this one, so I thought this was enough. Hopefully you enjoy it, and i'm sorry for any emotional pain this causes you! :)
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 18
Kudos: 168





	The Broken Princess

In the days since Queen Glimmer and Catra returned from Horde Prime’s ship, most things had gone back to normal. The Rebellion still strategized, still held meetings and trained. What hadn’t returned to normal was Catra and Glimmer’s relationships with Adora.

When they returned they couldn’t even meet her gaze for more than a moment. Guilt gnawing at them both. Glimmer had left Adora after multiple days of particularly horrible remarks directed at her. Blaming her for the Rebellion’s losses, and even worse, blaming her for the loss of her mother.

Catra on the other hand had spent every waking moment after Adora left the fright zone actively trying to hurt her, physically, emotionally, in every way possible, and she hated that she had succeeded. She succeeded in destroying her relationship with probably the only person who had always believed in her.

-

Adora ran, as fast as she could, down the long corridors of Bright Moon castle. Her legs ached, and her lungs burned, but she couldn’t stop, not yet. As she rounded the final corner into the throne room, she finally stopped.

Her eyes darted around the room looking for any sign of her friends. Their pink and split eyes found her ocean blue gaze, and both immediately looked away.

_Of course, they both still hate me._ She paused as, watching them for a few seconds. _At least they’re okay._

She watched as the rest of their friends had formed a circle around Glimmer, greeting her with relief and joy.

Catra’s reception was comparatively less frantic, with Scorpia wrapping her in a crushing hug, which Entrapta and Emily both excitedly joined.

_Good, they’re not alone._ With that worry easied, Adora walked back through the hallway. Now that those she cared about were safe, she only needed to do one thing, train.

-

Catra had expected to be attacked the second she arrived in Brightmoon, but instead most of them just crowded Glimmer, happy that she was safe. What she expected even less was for Scorpia and Entrapta to immediately assault her with affection.

“Scorpia, I’m fine, you can put me down now!”

Arms crossed and an irritated look on her face that she didn’t mean, Catra was doing her best to convince the strong woman to let her have some dignity here.

“Alright alright, wildcat. I’m so glad you’re okay, I’ve been worried sick! I’m sorry I left, but I had to do something to try to get through to you, can you ever forgive me?”

Another surprise, Catra didn’t expect this, she understood why Scorpia left, and as crushing as it was then, she didn’t hate her for it. Not anymore.

“It’s fine, you did what you had to. I guess it worked out in the end.”

The torrent of energy that followed didn’t really register in Catra’s mind, instead her eyes snapped back up to where she saw Adora a few moments before. Except, she was gone. Glancing at Glimmer, she saw a sad look on her face, looking at the same hallway. I guess they both burned that bridge.

Catra didn’t really pay much attention during the rest of their arrival, fumbling through the conversations, until she ended up in her new room. And she cried.

-

During the rebellion's first meeting, it was brought to everyone’s attention that She-Ra was gone. The sword was a means of using the weapon inside their planet, and Adora had managed to overpower the will of the First Ones and shattered the sword. No one seemed to be upset with Adora, they all of them understanding and more than okay with her decision. Glimmer had the least to say about it, mostly just nodding along, hating herself for not trusting Adora then.

Adora noticed very quickly during that meeting that both Catra and Glimmer refused to so much as look at her. A reminder of her failures as She-Ra’s vessel. So she let them be, and threw herself into training. She didn’t have the crutch of overwhelming magic to fall back on anymore, she needed to become better, faster, because now more than ever she was worthless.

-

It had been a couple days since the return of Catra and Queen Glimmer, and neither had spoken to Adora, much less seen her for more than a moment.

Both mornings they’d show up to breakfast, only to see Adora on the way out.

“Hey, Adora…” the words slid off Catra’s lips quietly, Adora didn’t stop, disappearing into the hallway before she even finished saying them.

_I’m sorry._

-

For days, Adora was practically a ghost to the rest of the residents of Bright Moon. Showing up briefly for meals, and vanishing shortly after. She spent all of her time in the training grounds, practicing with a sword, working out to build up muscle, or holed up in her room reading tactics or other combat books. 

“Hey, Adora, wait up!”

Bow was waving at her as he jogged up to the door to her room.

“Bow? Hey, what’s up?”

“I haven’t seen you in like a week, what’ve you been up to?”

“Oh, you know, training. Without the sword I need to be better, so I can actually help.”

“Hey, it’s alright, we’re still glad that you’re here, She-ra or not.”

If Bow noticed Adora stiffen at the name, he doesn’t say anything.

“Thanks, Bow, but I should get back to it, these tactics manuals aren’t going to read themselves!”

“Yeah, good luck, don’t be a stranger.”

With that the Adora disappeared into her room. Bow sighed and made his way back to Glimmer’s room.

-

“Well, how is she?”

Glimmer was in her bed, feet dangling from the elevated position. On the windowsill sat Catra, curled up and staring out the window.

“I don’t know, she seemed to be doing alright, she’s just focused on training.”

“Oh. Okay.”

Her expression fell and he swears Catra curls into herself even more.

Adora doesn’t stop, days of training, turned to weeks, and every day was the same, her only breaks were to eat, which she did alone in her room, and to sleep, which at this point, was becoming more and more difficult every night.

Every night he dreams were filled with memories of the past. All of the wrong decisions, leaving Catra, _hurting her._

Every night ended up with her waking up in a cold sweat. 

-

“Adora!” A familiar voice broke through the silence this morning, Bow was jogging up to her, with his usual warm smile.

“It’s been a while, how’re you doing?”

“Better, my swordplay is okay now, and I’ve definitely gotten stronger.”

As if to emphasize the point she flexed an arm, and it was definitely bigger than he remembered. Now that he looked closer, she had bulked up quite a bit.

She resumed her training during that moment of quiet.

“You’ve been training non-stop, can’t you at least take a day to hang out with the best friend squad like the good ol days?”

“It’s fine Bow, I know Glimmer and Catra are avoiding me, and I’m not going to force them into just talking to me.”

The casual way Adora said that was surprising, Bow was sure she’d be distressed, but she seemed to be surprisingly calm about all of it.

“Are you sure you don’t want to give it a try?”

“It’s alright, I still need to train more, I’m not as good as I need to be, maybe when I’m in tip top shape.”

“Alright, well, let me know when you’re ready.”

-

It wasn’t until a few days later that Bow had realized how wrong he had been. Worst of all, everyone saw it. They saw Adora’s composure crack, and shatter into pieces.

Horde Prime had set up research facilities around all of the runestones except the moonstone, that he would save for last, as a gesture of kindness.

Most of the runestones were easy to surround, as they had buildings around them already. The only exception was Plumeria. That’s where the rebellion struck.

They arrived suddenly, and began decimating the small army of clones that Prime had stationed there. The battle was short, Prime found their little assault amusing, not bothering to send reinforcements, he knew they couldn’t hold Plumeria, so he’d allow them their fantasy of rebellion, for now. The princesses rushed in, using their magic to begin overwhelming Prime’s clones and forcing them out of their small base.

The battle ends up being relatively short, with minimal losses for the Alliance.

-

After the battle they all gathered together to celebrate their victory over the Horde.

Most of the troops had set up their own tents, and the princesses had set up two small fires to sit around near the runestone.

“Hey, has anyone seen Adora?” Bow called out over the murmurs of his friends, most of them had grouped around a single fire and began excitedly talking about their part of the assault.

“I thought I saw her rush in ahead of most of us, she was kicking those clone’s asses!” Mermista followed the statement with a series of exaggerated motions of sword swings.

No one else seemed to have any ideas where she had run off to. “Alright, well I’m going to go look for her.”

There was a gentle murmur through the group affirming that they heard him, but no further reactions. He figured that most of them think Adora is probably training again, like she had been for the last two weeks now.

Catra watched him run off. Brows scrunching together, hoping he finds her unharmed.

-

Bow had been looking for well over an hour now and no signs of her. Anxiety had begun to well up in his stomach. Something was wrong.

Returning to the camp, out of breath and sore, the panic had only grown.

“Guys!” No one seemed to really respond to Bow’s exhausted shout. Why wasn’t anyone freaking out?

“Would you guys listen to me!” Everyone stopped. Staring at him in surprise. “Adora’s gone, I couldn’t find her, we have to find her, what if she got hurt.” The rambling words poured from his mouth, as the fear gripped him tighter.

“What if she’s-” The words get cut off as a clawed hand gripped his shoulder. It hurt, but the pain brought him back to the moment. His eyes met split colored ones.

“I can find her.” Catra’s gaze tore through Bow’s frantic thoughts. “Everyone split up, search the rubble, if you find anything that belongs to Adora, bring it to me.” For a moment everyone was still, breaths held, anxiety clouding the encampment.

“What are you all standing around for? Go!” That finally cut through and suddenly everyone jumped to action.

_Where are you, Adora?_

-

The next few hours were spent scouring the entire battlefield for any signs of their friend, to no avail. They met back up near Plumeria’s runestone. By now the tension and anxiety was crushing. It was then that Catra smelled her.

Catra pointed towards a trampled section of the woods. “She went that way, let’s go.”

Worried looks passed through the group, many of Horde Prime’s clones fled in that direction when they realized they were being overrun.

Following Catra’s lead everyone chased after her through the Whispering Woods, careful to not get lost, especially now that it was night.

They traveled for what felt like an eternity.

A sharp inhale stopped everyone in their tracks, as Catra stared wide eyed into a clearing. There, in the moonlight stood Adora. 

She looked awful. Her hair was matted and soaked with sweat and a mix of her blood, and the green blood of Prime’s clones. 

Her armor had been broken apart all over. Blood seeping from under the jagged edges.

She stood, hunched over, breaths coming loud and ragged. Her back faced her friends, and in front of her stood a clone.

The clearing was littered with at least a dozen of them, vile green blood, dried on their cyborg bodies.

“All that power you had, and you were too scared, too WEAK to use it.” The clone taunted, an evil grin crossing his lips.

“Shut up.” She gasped out through panting breaths.

“Maybe if someone better was She-ra they would’ve stopped all of this. You could’ve used the power, destroyed Prime and the rest of us.”

“I said shut up!”

Adora was shaking, seething with rage. At him, at Prime, at the world, especially at herself. She didn’t want to admit it, but he was right.

“And now that you destroyed the sword, you’re worthless!”

The words tore through Adora like nothing else could. _Worthless_ , _a failure_ , without her powers she was nothing more than a footsoldier, and a _weak_ one at that. A tear slid down her cheek and her rage swallowed everything in a burst of red.

The words tore out of her throat, raw and painful this time “SHUT UP!”

She launched herself at the clone, and swung down, faster than he had expected, her blade cleaving halfway into his torso. The sound of bones breaking, and metal crumpling tore through the air.

“Shut up. Shut up. SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!” She screamed out the words and she slammed her sword into the crumpling form, over and over.

All of her friends stood at the ends of the clearing, mouths held open in fear, and heartbreak. Watching as Adora, their friend, always strong, always there for them, fell apart.

The sword in her hands shattered after a few swings, and all she did was toss it aside and start punching.

Her fists colliding with metal and flesh, tearing through her knuckles. She didn’t even slow down.

“SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!” Each word punctuated by another wild blow.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, she stopped. Staring down at the body. But there was no rage left, Adora felt cold.

-

Adora stared out over the field, soon it would be filled with combat and danger, but right now, despite Prime’s hold, it was peaceful. Adora was fitted with the same armor of the usual Bright Moon soldiers. Another reminder that she was _weak_ now.

With a resigned sigh, she swore to herself. _I’ll prove to them all, i’m not useless. I can still help._

The battle was sudden, with Adora helming the charge, she insisted on that. It felt good to charge in first, like she used to, like she mattered. 

Clashing swords with one of the many clones, Adora released all of the pent up frustration in her. All of the training and the tension that had been building in her for the last few weeks, unloading on this unsuspecting copy of her enemy. She cut through two or three clones before they had time to react. The next one was ready, and he stopped her blade mid swing.

“Ah, there you are, She-ra.” The almost sweet tone of his voice combined with the words lit an anger in her stomach.

That anger was enough to not only deflect the clones incoming strike, but to also break through his attempt to parry her blow, the sheer force behind it too strong. 

Validation surged through her, her training was paying off. It was cut short by the princesses cutting through and past the rest of the battle. Magic weaving and tearing through swarms of horde clones. 

_I should be able to keep up with them!_ Her own thoughts screamed at her. _Not good enough, still not good enough!_

“Oh, I forgot, there is no more She-ra. Just a useless girl, who doomed them all.”

Another clone stepped to her.

“I’ll show you useless!”

-

The rage kept building inside of Adora, every clone she defeated felt like success. Only for another to approach, reaffirming that she wasn’t enough. That no matter how many she could take out now, it was nothing compared to She-ra.

The rage was blinding, mixing with the guilt and anxiety she’d felt for so long. Adora didn’t even notice that she had been following the clones in their retreat. Desperately keeping pace with a straggler into the woods.

“Oh the mighty soldier, come to prove herself.” A cold robotic chuckle spread through the woods as the clone turned on her.

“Do you truly think you could do anything meaningful?” He spat, and the words cut Adora more than any of the clones she’d fought.

Charging him, their swords clashed in the small clearing. Each strike being stopped or outright deflected.

“Oh poor child, is this all you can muster? A few pitiful strikes?”

Another surge of anger and a flurry of strikes, and her blade cut through his torso.

“How’s that for pitiful.”

“It very much is.” Twisting around, Adora locks eyes with another one. 

“So much struggling, what good does it do you?”

“It lets me wipe the floor with a whole squad of you.” A small grin peaks through her hardened expression.

“It might dampen your ego to know that Prime can easily make more of us. An infinite army.”

All of the blood in Adora’s veins turned cold. For a moment frozen. The next it was alight, fire pumping through her body, threatening to burn down her from the inside out.

She charges in that moment.

-

She doesn’t know how long she’s been in that clearing. Nearly a dozen clones lie in the grass around her. Her armor cracked in many places. Her sword chipped and chinked from a series of unending clashes. Her resolve crumbling with every cutting word from her enemies. 

Every new clone comes at her with more evidence that she’s _weak_. That no matter how hard she trains, _she’ll never come close to She-ra_. She’ll _never be good enough_. The only thing driving her now is rage. Not at the Horde, but because she knows that they’re right.

Her body aches. Old bruises agitated, and plenty of new ones from too many good hits taken. Her helmet was lost at least an hour ago. Golden hair wild around her face. Sticking to her face from sweat and blood.

Another clone, this one’s words pushing her over the edge. She barely registers any of them, except the last ones.

_“And now that you destroyed the sword, you’re worthless!”_

It’s too much. All this fighting, weeks of pushing herself, training. Hours of battle, it didn’t matter how many she beat, _there was always another_ , to show her how _she failed_ , _again_ , _she always failed._

_I just want it to stop…_

Rage, frustration, pain, all of it growing, filling her veins for weeks, months, years. All of it consumed her, eating away at her, she couldn’t hold it in anymore. Her entire body turned into fire, a pyre that swallowed the person called Adora.

She had never moved so quickly in her life. Sword swinging too fast to be stopped.

“Shut up. Shut up. Shut up!”

Every strike was punctuated with a violent scream tearing its way through her. Her blade striking the clone to the ground.

“Shut up!”

A series of slashes to his chest. 

“Shut up, shut up, shut up!”

Her sword cleaves into his chest, getting stuck. Followed by a kick to get him off of it.

“SHUT UP!”

Wild arcs into the prone cyborg beneath her.

“SHUT UP!”

Her sword finally shatters, the damaged blade cutting her shoulder as it flies away. The hilt follows shortly after

“SHUT UP!”

Her fists come down on his chest. The dull thud barely audible to her.

“SHUT UP!”

Blood splatters against her face with another slam. Angry gaze unflinching.

“SHUT UP!”

Jagged metal tears through the skin of her hands. She barely registers the pain.

“SHUT UP!”

The rage leaves her body rapidly

“Shut up!”

Exhaustion settles in her muscles, in her bones. The next slam only resulted in a squelch.

“Shut up…”

The pain comes to her next. Sharp in the tears of her hands, the cuts on her limbs. The ache of her muscles from weeks of overuse. 

Her vision begins to darken. _When did it get so cold?_

-

A haunting quiet fell over the clearing, the only sounds were the wind and Adora’s ragged breathing above the brutalized body of a clone.

Catra was the first one to act, quietly stepping out of the underbrush, calling to her friend.

“Adora.” Her voice was quiet, cracking from the tension.

The second she spoke, Adora spun around, a feral look in her eyes. Her eyes met Catra’s, and then the rest of her friends. In them she saw sadness, tears, _fear._

“Adora, it’s okay, you’re okay.”

Her eyes frantically bounced around the scene. _They saw it, saw her, they knew how pathetic she was now._

So she ran.

“Adora wait!” It only took Catra a split second and she was sprinting through the forest, following the sound of her friend gasping for breath.

“Adora, please wait, I just want to talk!”

No response.

A choked breath and a dull thud were the only reason she slowed down. Carefully stepping through the brush Catra finally caught up to her.

In front of her was Adora, on the ground, still scrambling to get away. From the looks of it she got tripped up by some roots and slammed the ground particularly hard. Her forehead was bleeding. She looked so beaten up, so scared.

But she knew that wasn’t the only reason. Part of it was Adora’s own doing, all that training, no one could handle that. Her body must’ve been breaking long before this.

Catra leaned down and wrapped her arms around Adora and immediately took an elbow to the face. Not deterred by it, she squeezed tighter.

How had Catra not noticed this, how had none of them noticed how much agony Adora had been in. How had it taken until this, until Adora literally and figuratively broke herself.

Despite her ruined muscles and battered bones, Adora kept struggling, her fingers digging into the forest floor, tearing at it.

“I’m sorry.” Catra practically sobbed the words into Adora’s back as she hugged her as close as she could.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t understand how much pain you were in.” Adora’s entire body froze. And for the second time that day, she broke. The trembling returned as she wailed in Catra’s arms.

Catra didn’t know what to do, she didn’t know if anything could ever heal her friend. So she did the only thing she could, she held Adora. Her own tears pouring against Adora’s back.

-

Covered in sweat and blood, Adora stood underneath the moonlight. It was finally quiet. After hours of battle, finally silence surrounded her. 

Her breathing was ragged and desperate. Like she'd been struggling for breath for the last hour.

The adrenaline and fury that had been carrying her was rapidly leaving her. Gods, did her body ache. Every part of her was in pain.

"Adora." 

She turned faster than she should've and her vision went white for a moment before it cleared. Standing in front of her was Catra, eyes full of pain.

_She saw it. Saw it, saw it, saw me!_

What was worse was the rest of her friends behind Catra. All of them staring wide eyed, in shock.

_They saw me. They know i’m weak!_

Catra's lips were moving, but she couldn't hear any of it. Blood was rushing to her ears, the panic had set in. 

_Run!_

Spinning around, Adora went into a full sprint into the woods. The blinding pain hitting her full force, but the mixture of adrenaline and panic pushed through. 

She had to run, now that they all knew, she couldn't pretend anymore. She didn't matter anymore. _Nothing did_.

Right as the thought popped into her head, her foot caught something. For a brief moment she was weightless, and then she slammed into the dirt.

White hot pain spiked through her ribs. 

_Run!_

Desperately she tried to scramble to her feet, but they gave out underneath her.

Something warm is pressing to her back, pulling her.

_Run!_

Her arms and legs dig into the dirt, clawing through it. But the pull is too much.

Suddenly she was enveloped in a soft warmth. The first comfort she'd felt in weeks.

_Please, run._

She begs herself, begs her body to give just a little more.

_I can't._

The admission breaks her, shatters the resolve that had been holding her together. For the first time in a long time, Adora cries, she shakes and thrashes against the warmth holding her. Screams and wails out all of the pain inside of her, years if trying, to help, to be good enough.

The pain tears its way through her, shuddering, uncontrollable, until there's nothing left. No emotions or thoughts left. Just that warmth holding her in place. 

Her mind recedes, the world hidden behind warped glass. Her movements stop. Her cries silenced.

A muffled voice rumbles against her back. The words muted, but she’d know that voice anywhere.

_Catra..._

-

It seemed like an eternity before Adora finally wears herself out. Her voice had long ago failed her. No more tears came. Even the trembling had stopped. Now she just lay slumped in Catra’s arms.

“I’m sorry, for not seeing how hurt you were, for not understanding, for hurting you, for avoiding you. I’m so so SO damn sorry Adora.” After a brief pause, she lifted them off the ground, cradling her friend in her arms. As she slowly walked back towards the clearing.

Catra tried not to look at Adora’s face at first, but that resolve didn’t last long, and finally, for the first time in nearly a month, she looked Adora in the eyes. In them she saw nothing. No rage, no anger, no sadness or pain, just empty. That shattered whatever was left of her heart.

Catra nuzzled against her face and purred, a small act of comfort offered to her friend.

When she reached the clearing again, she saw the whole princess alliance, they had grouped up in the clearing, reassuring each other that Adora was okay, the cries were gone.

The rustling of the bushes notified them of Catra’s arrival. For a second there was hope in their eyes, but when they saw Adora, their faces fell. Glimmer and Bow rushed to flank both sides of Catra.

“Adora? Are you okay?” Glimmer’s worry turned to fear when there was no response. “Catra what happened to her!”

“She broke.” Catra replied with a grim chuckle. “She pushed and pushed **and pushed** herself, for us, for this, and she **broke**!” She bit her lip hard enough to draw blood.

Rage burned through Catra. What was it all for? For vengeance? Fear? To prove that she was strong? Nothing was worth it, worth this. Why didn’t she just talk to Adora?

She was brought out of her spiral when a hand landed on each of her shoulders. Bow and Glimmer looked at her with sad smiles and tears in their eyes.

“Let’s go back, okay?” Bow nodded at her and led the group back to their camp.

-

Catra carried Adora the entire way back to camp, refusing to let anyone else so much as touch her. She hadn’t felt this protective of anyone in a long time, but she was sure that if anyone so much as bumped into Adora right now, she’d tear them apart with her own claws.

By the time they returned to camp Adora was out. Whether she had fallen asleep or went unconscious from the pain Catra didn’t know. Hopefully she could at least get some rest.

“I’m sorry I can’t stay but I have to fill in the troops about our plans for tomorrow. Take Adora to my tent, she can stay there, feel free to stay with her, okay?” Glimmer squeezed Catra’s shoulder and gave her a sad smile. “We’ll help any way we can.”

Catra met her eyes and they nodded at each other, a silent promise. _They would never let this happen again._

As Catra brought Adora into the Queen’s tent she didn’t even bother to look at the extravagance of it all. Walking over to the bed she sat her down and began to wipe off the caked on blood and mud. Thankfully most of the blood was from the squadron of clones that Adora tore through in that clearing.

_How could she ever doubt herself?_

Bow knelt down in front of them both and met Catra’s eyes. “I’ll get some hot water and some medical supplies, okay? You just stay here.” With a gentle squeeze and a reassuring smile he walked out of the tent.

Catra realized then why Bow had been one of Adora’s best friends. No matter what, he always tried to be there for her. That’s more than she could say about herself.

She may as well do something useful while Bow was out there. Gently she woke Adora. Hoping that maybe there’d be something there in her eyes. But they were vacant again. Not responding to anything she did, no emotion.

_First things first, water_.

After the long battle, the chase, and all the tears, she must be dehydrated. If she was, she didn’t seem to care. So Catra tried to slowly pour water into her mouth. Thankfully it worked, at least her instincts still reacted, and she slowly got her to drink.

Next was getting her out of her combat gear and into something cleaner. She rummaged around for some robes, one for now, and the other for after she was cleaned up. Getting her gear off was easier than expected. Though Adora didn’t help, she didn’t fight Catra about it.

The state of Adora’s injuries was nauseating. The cuts and battle damage she was used to. But the bruising. It was every shade she could’ve imagined, and they covered nearly all of her. That long sleeve shirt she wore hid it well.

Shortly after Catra got her wrapped up in a robe Bow came in with Mermista and Frosta.

“Okay so we got some hot water, and some ice for any swelling. Mermista and Frosta can help, I’ll be outside getting some food prepared, let me know if you need anything else okay?” With a nod and another smile he left.

“You two can go, I’ll take care of the clean up.”

“Hey, she’s our friend too we want to help.” Mermista’s response was more bitter than usual.

“I get that, but trust me, you don’t want to see what she looks like under that robe.”

“This is ridiculous, how bad could it b-“ Mermista’s complaint got caught in her throat as she slowly opened the robe. And then she was outside the tent vomiting.

“Told you.” Catra responded, her usual bite missing from the words.

“I’ll let the rest of them know to keep out for a while.”

“Thanks, Frosta.” She saw the worry on the young girl's face. “She’ll be okay, we’ll make sure she recovers, yeah?”

Her weak smile did little convincing, and honestly she didn’t believe herself. Frosta at least appreciated the gesture and left the tent.

First thing’s first was cleaning Adora, a series of hot towels to wipe away all of the dirt and blood, and gods there was still so much blood.

The entire time all she could think about was Adora hunched over that clone, fists pounding against his lifeless body. The memory made her shudder but she kept going.

After drying Adora off she started treating the cuts. Most of them seemed shallow, seemingly caused by the jagged breaks in her armor tearing up her skin when she moved around. 

Then there was the welt on her forearm. What looked like swelling at first ended up being a broken bone. She'd seen enough of them in the Horde. Not wanting to leave, she just snapped the leg off of a chair and used it to brace the arm.

At some point she noticed that Adora hadn’t fallen back unconscious, she was still out of it, but her eyes were open. So Catra started talking.

“It’s okay Adora, you don’t have to worry about being perfect. You can just be yourself, we all still love you.”

She hesitated for a moment, but she had to say it.

“ **I** still love you. I know that probably doesn’t make sense since I’ve treated you like shit since all of this started. But I do." 

Catra looked up, hoping to see those beautiful blue eyes she remembered. But that would be too easy, and the empty stare she saw hurt even though she knew it would be there.

After laying Adora in the bed Catra pulled up a chair and watched Adora’s chest rise and fall. But Adora didn’t fall asleep, after what felt like an hour her eyes were still cracked open. She needed to rest.

Remembering her time in the Horde, Catra curled up next to Adora, gently resting her head on her chest, and began to purr.

Adora had said it was calming when they were younger. Apparently, she was telling the truth because within minutes she was out.

-

Catra hoped that Adora would be fine in the morning, that it was just a terrible nightmare, that Adora would’ve come back to her. Instead she saw the same thing as the night before. The same vacant blue eyes. She didn’t know how much more of it she could handle.

Shaking her head she realized it didn’t matter how much it hurt. She had to be here for Adora now. She wanted to be here for her.

“Okay Adora, let’s get you something to drink, you must be thirsty as hell.” Propping her body up, Catra slowly guided water to Adora’s lips. It took a second, but thankfully instincts prevailed again and she drank it down. A lot of it too. 

Laying Adora against her chest, Catra gently rubbed up and down her arms. Gently nuzzling and purring, hoping that this little comfort she could offer might bring her back.

-

It was noon when Glimmer finally entered her tent again. She was immediately greeted by the sight of Adora laying against Catra. She had fallen asleep in her arms. Catra was awake however, gaze fixed on the woman in her arms. Gently offering small comforts.

“How is she?” Thankfully it seems Catra heard her come in, because she didn’t react in the slightest to her sudden vocalization.

“She was awake, but she’s still gone. I got her to drink some water and fall back asleep for now.”

“Are you okay?”

That question did surprise Catra. They may have gotten closer in Prime’s ship, but they were still far from best friends.

A sigh escaped her lips before she responded. “Of course not. My best friend, the only person I’ve ever loved is gone. And it’s my fucking fault.”

“Catra, it’s not yo-”

“Yes it is! I should’ve tried to be better! She begged me to come with her, even when I did nothing but hurt her, she kept trying! But I didn’t care. I didn’t want anything to change, and when it did I attacked her.”

“Because you were in pain too.”

The words cut through Catra’s spiraling self hatred like a knife.

“Trust me, I know how much pain can blind someone. I’m as much at fault as you are.”

They exchanged knowing sad looks. Glimmer understood her right now. She hurt Adora too, and she felt just as awful.

“We’re going to start heading back to Brightmoon today, we leave in an hour. We can have someone else carry her.”

“No! … No, I’ll do it. I want to do it.”

Glimmer just gave her a weak smile and said, “No problem. I’ll get you something to eat before we head out, be right back.”

-

The trip back to Brightmoon was quiet at first. But after about an hour Bow started talking and making an occasional joke. Single-handedly he brought up the mood of the entire group. Soon enough there was lighthearted chatter around Catra, and she smiled a small bittersweet smile. Maybe they’ll be able to figure this out.

They arrived in Brightmoon that night. Catra was sore, but that was okay, she was almost glad for it. A reminder that she was here for Adora. The first order of business was to have Adora’s condition evaluated.

“Miss, we’re going to have to ask you to leave the room.”

Catra glared at the doctor, hands balling up into fists so she wouldn’t tear her apart at the suggestion.

“Like hell I am, I am not leaving her alone for a second, you got that?”

“Miss, we can’t l-“

“You will allow Catra to stay as long as she wishes.” Glimmer’s commanding voice broke through any complaints.

“Queen Glimmer are you-“

“ **That** is an order.”

The doctor nodded and began her examination. Cleaning and treating the cuts while mostly just assessing the rest of the damage. Finally Adora’s broken arm was put in a cast, to help it heal.

-

“She’s in pretty bad condition, she’s been running her body into the ground for some time. Whatever happened out there pushed her too far.”

“Will she be able to recover?” Glimmer’s regal façade was gone now, replaced by deep concern.

“Well, her arm is broken, there’s a lot of muscle damage, though thankfully, no tears all the way through. With the right recovery plan she should be mostly back to normal."

For a moment both Catra’s and Glimmer’s expressions lightened.

“However, I cannot guarantee that she will regain all function in her right hand.”

Glimmer and Catra’s faces both dropped.

“The break wasn’t bad enough that we couldn’t set it back, but the nature of the break looks to have caused some lacerations to the nerves in her arm.”

The tension in the room was almost unbearable, finally being broken by the doctor speaking again.

“She will regain the use of her hand, but it might not be as good as new is all. Other than that some of the deeper cuts will likely scar, but that’s all."

Exchanging a nervous look with Catra, Glimmer spoke.

“Thank you, we’ll take her back to her chambers now.”

Catra lifted Adora off the exam table and Glimmer teleported them back to her bedroom. Both of them let out a long sigh. It wasn’t terrible news, most of the damage wasn’t permanent, _but her arm._

Laying her down, Catra was the first to speak.

“We have to talk to her about what happened when she’s awake.”

“Not right away. If she starts going back into herself like that, we won’t be able to do anything.”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll let you sleep, you must be exhausted.”

Catra snorted her response, “You’ve got no idea.” The moment of silence after didn’t last long.

“No, that’s not fair, you must be just as tired.”

“It’s alright but, thank you.” A sad smile and some sparkles and Glimmer was gone.

-

The next day was mostly the same. There was less walking, and thankfully Bow and Glimmer visited. It was awkward at first, since there was still some tension being former enemies and all that. But they ended up talking about all the weird differences between life in Brightmoon and life in the Horde. Like how they ate something other than ration bars. Or that they didn’t have to train through illness and injury.

It was strange to see how much kinder life was outside of the Horde.

“You’re telling me, you can just take a break whenever you want?” The disbelief in Catra’s face and voice was apparently hilarious for Bow and Glimmer, because they could not stop cackling.

“Not exactly, we’d get lectured about the importance of learning and responsibility and all that, but sometimes it’s worth it.” Glimmer had apparently skipped a lot of training.

“Sometimes? In the Horde you’d lose your rations for like three days, and you’d get forced into training with the older soldiers, and they did not go easy on you. Do you know how many times I had to spar with Octavia?”

Bow winced at that, “The one with the tentacles? That’s ridiculously unfair, she’s way older than you!”

“Yeah well, maybe they hated me more than the average cadet.”

“I’m sorry about that.”

“Don’t be, it’s fine, it made me strong.”

“That doesn’t mean it was right.”

The response stopped her in her tracks. Normally she’d respond with some biting sarcasm, or snarky one liner. But both Bow and Glimmer had been really kind to her and she couldn’t bring herself to get angry at them for it.

“Thanks.”

Maybe she didn’t have to scream to be listened to anymore.

-

Adora woke up in a haze. Where was she, everything hurt. Why was it so bright, it was night time last she remembered. Scanning the room she realized she was in her room. The slight rumbling on her chest. _Catra._

“Catra.” She tried to call out, but if her vocal chords made a noise, she couldn’t hear it.

Thinking back, the night of her breakdown started coming back like a horrible dream. The panicked energy filled her again, and her entire body screamed as she tried to leap out of her bed. Unfortunately, she only managed to jerk her body about an inch off the bed before a blinding pain tore through every nerve ending in her body.

-

Catra woke to her head jerking up suddenly, and a hollow scream erupting beneath her.

“Adora! What are you doing?!” Eyes locked on Adora’s she saw those ocean blue eyes, no longer vacant, but the sheer terror in them wasn’t much better. And the convulsions rocking through her battered body had to be agonizing.

Catra quickly lifted her trembling form and held it against her chest in a gentle embrace. “Shhhhh, it’s okay Adora, you’re okay, we’re okay.” Focusing her gaze on those pools of blue, which were quickly turning empty again.

“Adora! Please don’t leave, please!” Gods, she sounded so pathetic now, tears dripping on Adora’s cheeks. “Please, stay with me.”

Adora’s eyes shut tightly. But the shaking started to subside, she was breathing again. Catra just continued whispering soft pleas and reassurances, hoping that it was enough for once, that she was enough.

When she finally opened her eyes, the blue eyes looking back at her weren’t empty, they were very much active, and locked in on her.

A strangled sob escaped her lips as relief washed over her.

Confusion crossed Adora’s pained face.

‘How?’ The word was mouthed rather than spoken.

“We took care of you. Carried you back. Gods Adora, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t come to you the second I got back. I was so scared that I ruined any chance of us being together.”

‘It’s okay.’

“No! It isn’t. You deserve better, so much better.” Just like that her tears started coming again.

‘I’m fine, just need to rest a little, i’ll be fine in no time.’

The weary smile Adora gave her did nothing to calm Catra’s worry.

“Adora, no!” Catra squeezed her tighter. ”You’re not okay, and I’m not going to let you act like everything is fine.” She wanted to shut her eyes, to make it easier, but she couldn’t help watching the endless blue of Adora’s eyes.

“I’m not going to let you suffer alone again. Do you understand me? I promised.”

The only response Adora gave was tears streaming down her face.

-

Eventually they stopped crying. Catra laid her down, and curled up against her side. Not long after Catra fell asleep and purring filled the bedroom.

Adora just lay there, watching her. Reminded of a simpler time, before magic and princesses, before world ending weapons and empires. To a small bunk lost among dirty pipes and smoke.

All the nights spent together, how much easier it was then. How easy it was to just be close to one another. All the misunderstanding, all the pain they caused each other. Why didn’t she do better by Catra. She should’ve fought for Catra, should’ve tried to understand her better.

-

Her nap wasn’t long, and she woke to Adora’s gaze, transfixed on her.

“Hey, Adora.” Both of them froze. Neither one expecting those words, especially in a tone that soft and gentle. They’d been uttered so many times with spite, with anger. Not this genuine care.

Tears started welled up in Adora’s eyes again. ‘I’m sorry.’ 

She barely finished mouthing the apology before Catra pulled her into a gentle hug. “Don’t be, you didn’t do anything. I’m sorry for saying, that.” 

_That._ They both knew exactly what she meant.

It took a few minutes for them both to relax.

“Alright, we need to get you something to eat, okay?”

‘Okay.’

Sliding an arm under her knees and shoulders, Catra gently lifted her injured friend and brought her to the mess hall. As gentle as she could manage, she sat Adora down and quickly ordered the cooks to make a big breakfast. 

“Alright, they’re going to be bringing in a lot, and you’re gonna have to eat as much as you can, got it?”

‘Okay.’

-

It wasn’t too long until breakfast was brought out. The meal was quiet, until Glimmer arrived. 

“Adora?”

Panic set into Adora in an instant. Slowly she turned to meet Glimmer’s gaze.

‘H-’ her introduction was cut short when she saw the way Glimmer looked at her. That worry twisted by fear. Fear of her. She looked away.

“Adora, look, i’m sorry. I should’ve come to see you the minute I returned and apologized. You were right, about the Heart of Etheria, about all of it.”

“Glimmer. Can you have this conversation another time, once she’s healed up?” Catra nodded towards Adora. Her eyes were squeezed shut, her body frozen.

“Y-yeah. No problem.” Placing a gentle hand on Adora’s shoulder, Glimmer spoke again. “I’m here for you if you need anything, okay?”

She waited for a moment before pink sparkles replaced her.

Finally Adora let out the breath she was holding. 

“You okay?” Catra was worried, but she didn’t let that seep into her question. The last thing Adora needed right now was to feel more helpless.

‘Yeah. Sorry…”

“Don’t apologize, at least not to me, after everything I've done."

‘I’m sorry about that too.’

Adora’s gaze stayed on the floor. In that moment she looked sadder than Catra had ever seen her. There wasn’t much eating done after that.

-

That afternoon Catra took Adora to the crystal pools, they hadn’t really had access to a nice bath in a while and she thought both of them could use one. Catra gently sat her friend down, being careful to let her adjust to the heat of the steaming bath. 

She waited a few moments, letting Adora get comfortable, before she got up to leave. Or she tried to. Only for Adora’s hand to shoot out of the water and grab her wrist, in a stronger grip than expected.

“AGH!” 

Adora’s strangled scream bounced around the bath. Catra spun around and stared at Adora in disbelief.

“Adora! What are you doing? Are you crazy? Let go, you’re still very much injured, idiot!”

‘Don’t go... Please…’ As much as gripping Catra so tightly must have hurt, the tears and fear in her eyes did more than enough convincing.

“Okay, okay, i’ll stay.” Adora stared into her split eyes for what felt like an eternity. Begging her to stay, looking for any signs that she might leave.

“Promise?” Adora’s voice was hollow and barely audible, but she forced herself to say it. 

Catra froze. The reminder of their childhood shocking her still for a moment.

“Promise.”

Adora’s grip finally loosed, accompanied by a pained whimper.

“Let me just get comfortable. If i’m going to stay, I might as well take a bath too.”

She had never felt so nervous in her life. The entire time she was changing, Adora’s gaze washed over her. Why was she nervous? They’d changed in front of each other in the horde.

She changed as quickly as possible and sank into the bath. Avoiding Adora, and avoiding her gaze. But everytime she closed her eyes, she just saw those pools of blue staring back.

Her thoughts were cut off by a splash, and she looked up towards Adora.

‘Hey, come here.’ 

Adora motioned her over with her head while holding her arms out towards Catra.

“It’s fine, you don’t have to force yourself to act like everything’s fixed.”

She mentally recoiled at the look of hurt that flashed over Adora’s face. But the determined pout that followed was worse. 

‘Catra, please?’

The staredown didn’t last long. She couldn’t deny Adora when she looked at her like that.

“Ugh, fine.” Moving into the space between Adora’s arms, Catra tried her best to sound upset. 

‘Thank you, for staying.’ The little smile Adora gave her dissolved her already shaky tough guy act. 

-

Adora woke up a few days later. From the way the cool blue light permeated the room, it must’ve been just before sunrise.

Catra was curled up against her again. Her head resting on Adora’s chest. She looked so peaceful.

Images of their childhood flooded into Adora’s mind. She missed this, more than anything, she missed being able to just sleep together with Catra again. After everything that’s happened, they’re together again.

She gently started running a hand through Catra’s wild mane. Her movements were still weak, but being able to do this, it took away a lot of the anxiety over her injuries. Maybe another week of rest. Then she could start her physical recovery.

All of that wasn’t important right now. All that mattered is that Catra was back. And she was never going to leave her again. 

The soft rumbling of Catra’s purrs caught her off guard. Gods, _she missed that._

-

As Catra’s senses came back to her. She quickly noticed the hand gently moving through her hair. It was slow, deliberate. Taking great care not to get caught or tangled in her wild hair.

Slowly she blinked her eyes open. Adora’s eyes were closed and she wore a slight smile.

“Morning Catra.” Opening her eyes, Catra’s thoughts ground to a halt, and her breathing hitched.

The light of the brilliant orange sunrise had filled the room, causing Adora to practically glow, her golden hair shimmering. Cutting through her ethereal features, her vibrant blue eyes. They pierced through Catra’s thoughts.

Apparently, she’d been gawking for too long, because Adora chuckled. The sound was faint, but her smile only grew. 

“You okay, Catra?” Sputtering, she looked away, she had to look away from Adora right now. 

“Y-yeah. Um… How are you feeling?” There was a long pause after, and it took all of Catra’s willpower not to look back up at Adora’s face.

“Right now? I feel like this is the only place I ever want to be.”

It was a good thing she was looking away from Adora, because she could definitely feel her face heating up.

“Y-yeah. Me too.” 

-

Another week had passed before Adora began physical therapy. She could move a lot more than before. She could even lift herself up in bed. The grip in her right hand was still very weak. But walking was still a far off goal.

The days leading up to it had been nice. After finally admitting her fears, she felt so much lighter. Like the weight of the world backed off just enough. 

Catra had been helping her, and they'd started teasing each other again. It wasn’t the same as before. But it was progress. Maybe with enough time they could find that trust again.

They had been sleeping in again. Well, more like pretending to sleep, until Catra lifted herself up.

"Alright, enough beauty sleep, princess. We've gotta start your therapy." 

"Ha, ha” Adora responded, dryly, “I woke up before you, again. Maybe next time I should wake you up, huh?"

"Oh, shut up!” Though she wanted to scowl at Adora, neither one of them could wipe the smirk off their faces. 

A quick change, and walk, with Adora heavily leaning on Catra, and they were at a smaller chamber. Formerly a bedroom, now converted into a rehabilitation room. 

There was still a bed, in case Adora needed it. The rest of the room was covered in various exercise equipment, specifically tailored to her reduced strength. It made her stomach churn.

“Ah, hello there, it is good to see you again. I’m Liza Curtis, i’ll be working with you for the foreseeable future.”

Sitting in a chair beside an exam table was an older woman, dark brown hair streaked with white. She was casually dressed, and smiled brightly at both of them.

“I suppose we should start with a physical examination. To see where you are currently at, is that alright with you Princess Adora?”

The muscles in Adora’s back tightened. _Not a princess anymore._

“Just Adora, please.” 

Catra wouldn’t have noticed by the way Adora spoke or looked, but her tensing back muscles gave away how she felt at being called a princess. She gently rested her hand on Adora’s back.

“Alright, Adora, shall we begin?”

-

Twenty minutes. 

Twenty minutes of stretching and bending that felt like she was on fire. Every push sending blinding pain through her system. Catra stood by the bed the entire time, gently whispering to her friend. Offering some small comfort through the pain.

“Alright, we’re all done with the exam.” Liza was trying, and failing to suppress a frown. “I’ll be honest with you Adora, your recovery is going to be very difficult. Your range of motion is quite poor, and your strength and stamina both seem to be worse than expected.”

Already Adora felt herself shrinking at every word.

_Worse than expected. Weak._

Catra watched Adora like a hawk the entire time, and she didn’t miss the way Adora almost recoiled at the words. Or the way her eyes had become unfocused. She wrapped an arm around her shoulder, and lightly shook her friend. Their eyes met for a moment.

“It’s okay. You can do this. I’m here for you.”

Those words brought her back to the present. The promise of Catra staying was enough reason to try.

“For today, i’ll have you do some light strength exercises for as long as you can keep going.”

The entire experience was grueling. Every little exercise lit her muscles on fire even though they should’ve been easy. Every attempt was harder than the last, her body giving out slowly, and her mind spiralling. The only thing that kept her going was Catra. Who sat next to her the entire time. Offering soft touches, or reassuring words.

-

Adora was pretty quiet the rest of the day. Not only had she pushed through a mountain of physical pain. But the whole thing took a toll on her emotions. It felt like a reaffirmation that she just messes up. First she broke the sword, and then, due to her own fears, she broke herself. 

Catra didn’t try to force her to talk either. She just helped her through the day, until they were in the crystal baths again.

“Hey, are you okay?” The question was hesitant, like any moment Adora would crumble from the pain of it all.

“Y-yeah. I’m just tired. Today was rough.”

“Yeah, I get that. If you want to talk i’m always here for you, okay?”

Adora only nodded, her eyelids barely open while she stared at the water. Not knowing what else to do, Catra pulled her in for a hug. It was gentle, an offering of comfort, and thankfully, Adora accepted it.

-

The next morning was strange, Adora seemed completely back to normal, no trace of that distant look. As if yesterday hadn’t drained her completely. Or at least that was the case until Catra brought up the cause of her distance.

It was early afternoon, and they’d been relaxing in the garden. It was oddly soothing, despite the fact that it was very much still in the castle.

“Hey, we should probably head back to your room soon. You’ve got to do your daily routine. Curtis’s orders.”

“Aw man, can’t we just spend some more time together first? I love just getting to hang out with you again, we still have time in the day!”

A strange expression crossed Adora’s features for only a moment before she was smiling at Catra again. Gods, it was distracting. It’d been so long since Adora looked at her that way, and she missed it so much.

“Alright, I suppose we can hang out a little longer. But only like, another hour, got it?”

“Wow, that’s harsh, and here I thought you liked hanging out with me.”

She turned to Catra, with the saddest pout imaginable.

_Oh no, not this again._

“Oh shut up, you know I love hanging out with you! But you need to keep up with the recovery plan.”

Leave it to Adora to pout her way through Catra’s resolve.

_Ugh, why is she so adorable._

“Fine! Two hours! Now, can you please stop looking at me like that?”

Adora just laughed in response, and Catra couldn’t even pretend to be upset, not when Adora looked so happy.

“Thanks Catra.”

There was that strange look again.

-

Adora became a lot less energetic as the hours went by, and by the time they returned to her room, she was largely unresponsive.

Shortly after carrying her in, Catra sat Adora on the bed.

**SMACK**

Both of Catra’s hands slapped on either side of Adora’s cheeks, loudly. As she stared down those vacant blue eyes again.

The stinging sensation brought Adora back into the moment. Her eyes finally saw Catra, who stared at her, frustrated and worried.

“Ow…”

“Sorry about that princess, but you were spaced out, and basically ignoring me.”

“Sorry...” Adora’s eyes darted away immediately. She couldn’t look at Catra right now.

“Look. I get that doing this physical therapy stuff hurts. But please don’t shut me out, I want to be here for you. I-i know that I haven’t been great at that. But let me try.”

Catra’s hands fell away from her face and rested gently on her shoulders.

Adora shut her eyes tightly. 

_1… Inhale. 2… Hold. 3… Hold. 4… Hold. 5… Exhale_

Opening her eyes again, she focused on the split blue and gold stare of Catra. Her best friend. The most important person she’d ever known.

“Okay. I’m okay.” The words came out mechanically, like a very controlled habit.

“I’m. I am scared. Scared to work at this because.”

Another big inhale, hold, and exhale. “I’m scared because this feels like, like i’m admitting that I failed, that I wasn’t good enough. And, and even worse, i’m scared that i’ll lose you again if everything goes back to normal.”

A series of deep breaths followed, each becoming more ragged. 

“Because last time I started fighting, I lost- NO!... No, I hurt you. I never want to do that again! Catra I can’t do that again!”

Her entire body had begun shaking by now. Tears streaming down her cheeks. 

“Shhhhhhh, it’s okay, it’s okay, we’re okay now.” Catra wrapped her shaking form in a tight hug. Gently stroking her hair and whispering soft reassurances, followed by the occasional purr.

When Adora finally calmed down, Catra broke the silence.

“Thanks for telling me that. I know it’s hard to see it right now but, you were the best She-Ra anyone could’ve expected. No, you are the best She-Ra, you hear me? You did everything, EVERYTHING, in your power to help as many people as you could. You broke yourself for the world, and if it can’t see that, then it didn’t deserve you!”

Adora clung to Catra’s shirt tighter and tighter as she spoke. Sobs occasionally tearing through her.

"You are enough! You've always been enough."

_ To me. _ Catra thought. She couldn't bring herself to say it, not now. Not like this.

“As for me. I’m not leaving, never again. After everything that happened, it wasn’t like it was all your fault. We both didn’t really understand each other. Maybe if we had just talked then, it would’ve been so much easier. But we know better now, yeah? And we’re on the same side now.”

They held each other for a long while. Pulling comfort from each other’s presence. Despite all of the pain involved, it was nice. To be able to just hold each other like this, to bear their emotions and be vulnerable, and accepted.

“I guess I should start, huh?” Despite the puffed up, tired eyes, and exhausted expression. The small smirk Adora gave her stopped her for a second. 

Here she was, this incredibly strong, incredibly kind, amazing girl. Who had given up everything she had, who twisted and broke herself to fix anything she could. Yet here she was, picking herself back up, even after just falling apart in front of Catras very eyes. Adora was still trying.

Catra had to force back the tears threatening to escape. Adora was so beautifully, so heartbreakingly strong. 

“Let me help you at least.”

-

The first few days weren’t too bad. The physical therapy was difficult, but having Catra there, supporting and comforting her, helped a ton.

But, as the days went on, the exercises didn’t feel like they were getting easier, and the frustration kept building. 

It was a little over a week later when Adora snapped. Yet again she was doing an exercise where she pulled against tension. Her muscles screamed in protest. It was her last set, and since starting, she’d only been able to pull it a foot further. 

That realization sent fury through her veins. She pulled harder, as hard as her broken body would let her, until it gave out and she was pulled back.

“Damn it!” Adora lifted her head up and smacked it into the floor. “I hate this! Every damn day, I do the training, and push, and push, and push myself, and I can still barely even prop myself up!”

This time instead of her head hitting the floor, it was stopped by a soft hand.

_Catra._

Adora felt herself lifted into a warm embrace, and for a moment, all the anger and frustration froze.

Unable to help herself, Adora locked eyes with Catra. Those beautiful split eyes. The sun and the sky. 

She didn’t realize how close she’d pulled Catra until she broke the silence.

“W-we should pr-probably go see Glimmer! She wanted to talk about how you’ve been doing.”

The cracking of her voice was not lost on them, and both quickly looked away, pink dusting their cheeks. 

“Y-yeah. Let’s do that.”

Adora hadn’t moved, first she stared at Catra like she was looking into her soul, and now she was clinging to her like her life depended on it. Why was her heart beating so fast?

-

“So.”

Glimmer sat on her bed, while Bow was resting in a chair by the window. Of course Glimmer didn’t want to meet in the throne room. This wasn’t some duty or chore, this was her friend. She wanted it to feel like the old days again. Like they’d never fought seriously. Like she didn’t hurt Adora.

“How’s the therapy coming along?”

“Not great, Glim. I still can’t walk without a lot of help, or do more than lift myself up in bed. But it’s better than before, I guess.”

The nickname threw her off for a moment, and judging by how Bow’s attention shifted to her for a second, apparently she wasn’t the only one who was surprised. Judging by how Catra’s eyes met hers for a moment, apparently, it wasn’t a subtle reaction.

“Ah, sorry, I mean, Queen Glimmer.”

“No! No, don’t call me that, please. I should never have used that to force you to do whatever I wanted. I’m sorry.” There was a moment of silence as Glimmer’s eyes darted down to her hands. A mental struggle to decide whether to just let it all out right now.

“I’m sorry, Adora. I should’ve listened to you, you were right and you tried to be reasonable, and I didn’t listen. I was a bad friend, and honestly, kind of just a bad person. I should never have blamed you for any of this. I’m sorry.”

Glimmer glanced toward Adora, who was looking pensive. Was she going to accept that? Why would she? After Shadow Weaver, blaming Adora, and ignoring her, why should she?

“It’s okay Glimmer. I get why you did it. It hurt a lot, and it still does, but I think I get it now. I don’t hate you or anything. Honestly, even when you came back and wouldn’t look at me, I didn’t hate you. I was just glad that you were okay, that both of you were.”

Stunned silence filled the space. None of them had expected that response. Adora should be angry, she has every right to be, but instead she’s being compassionate. It made the guilt in her chest even heavier.

“You should, and even if you don’t, I do. It’s my fault that Horde Prime is here, it’s my fault that you had to break the sword. If I had just listened to you, talked to you. Well, I guess there’s no telling how things would’ve turned out.”

“You’re right, you messed up.”

Glimmer visibly flinched at that admission.

“But, everyone messes up. You, me, the other princesses, Hordak. That’s okay, you’re doing your best, and that’s all anyone can ask of you.”

They shared a weak smile, a pained understanding. 

“Well, enough of me crying, would you be okay with me having Dr. Curtis start the next step of your therapy?”

“Hmm? Oh, yeah, I guess that’s okay, gotta do it some time.”

The atmosphere around them was still tense, but much easier than it’d been in months. They were all glad for it. After everything that’s happened, and Prime’s arrival, rekindling their friendship was very much like a star in the cold night sky.

“How’s the situation with Prime by the way? I haven’t been able to ask.”

“Oh, um, yeah. He thought our attack on Plumeria was funny. Something about precocious children. I guess he was done with Plumeria for now, didn’t seem to care that we took it, he did say he’ll take it back when he needs it again.”

_So it didn’t matter in the end. My fighting was pointless, again._

The intrusive thoughts had begun rushing back. 

“I’m tired, I think I should go to sleep. Catra?”

“You sure you’re okay Adora?”

Bow was staring into her eyes, a silent plea, hoping that she’d be willing to talk to them if something was wrong.

“Yeah, i’m just tired, the rehab is exhausting, you know?”

“Alright, well take it easy, and if you need anything-”

“Let you or the guards know, I got it… Thanks.”

A quick nod between them all and Glimmer teleported down to take them back.

“Wait, we’ll walk, Curtis said I need to try walking with help a bit more.”

“O-okay.”

With Adora draped around Catra, and both of them clinging to each other tightly, they hobbled out of Glimmer’s room. The walk wasn’t far, they’ll be fine.

-

As the door closed, she waited for a few seconds before speaking.

“You think she’s really okay, Bow?”

“I think she’s doing better, but maybe she’s still not all good. I can’t blame her for that.”

“I know, I just wish she’d talk to us, to anyone about it.”

They finally looked away from the door, meeting each other’s gaze. Worry covering their faces.

“Give her some time, if she’s still like that after she gets stronger, then we’ll suggest actual therapy.”

“Yeah, you’re right, I just hate seeing her like, well, like THAT.”

“I know what you mean, I think she just needs some time.”

-

She was wrong about walking back. It was definitely not fine. Not even 30 feet later, Adora nearly collapsed.

“Woah, okay, no more walking.”

Thankfully Catra had been fixated on Adora the entire time, and caught her quickly.

“I’m fine, I just need a breather.”

“Adora, you’re not fine, and that’s okay, we can go for another walk tomorrow.”

The cloudy thoughts around her head had only gotten worse, seeing Glimmer again had taken its toll on her, and that mixed with the weak attempt at walking was just the icing on the miserable cake.

“Catra, I said I’m-”

The rest of the sentence got caught in her throat as Catra hoisted her up in her arms, and began carrying her.

“You are not _fine_ Adora, and you’re not going to talk your way out of this one. You need rest as much as you need to exercise, and it’s my job to make sure you get that rest, got it?”

Surprise slowly turned to realization, and finally resignation on her face, as Adora simply nodded her reply.

“Good.”

-

The rest of the night was quiet. By the time they made it back to their room, Adora was stuck in her thoughts again. Briefly being pulled out of them to get ready for bed. Unlike Catra, she didn’t end up falling asleep. Instead her mind was preoccupied with glimpses of her past.

Leaving the Horde, _leaving Catra,_ stopping the portal, _losing Angella,_ fighting with Glimmer, _losing the sword,_ the attack on Plumeria, _everyone seeing how weak she had become_. She didn’t know how long she spiraled in those thoughts, but eventually it was morning, and Catra was waking her up.

“Hey, sleepyhead, you plan on getting up anytime soon?”

_Catra. Catra’s here, it’s okay, i’m okay._

“Yeah, yeah, i’m up.”

-

It was incredible how much Adora had cheered up since they bumped up the training. Using actual weights with longer durations. She was finally able to walk with assistance. Rather than basically being held up by Catra like before. 

“ADORA!” 

The loud half screech of one excited Bow froze her in place for a second.

“Heeeeeey, Bow, what’s up?”

“What’s up? What’s up?! You’re walking! How long has this been going on? And you didn’t tell me? Adora, i’m devastated!” 

Bow’s face shifted rapidly from shock, to joy, to faux hurt, to overdramatic outrage, bringing out a genuine laugh.

“I’m sorry, i’m sorry, geez, it’s only been a couple days Bow, I wanted to make sure it wasn’t a fluke before I went around telling everyone, you know?”

“That’s fair. But, man, this is great! You’ve been working super hard according to Glimmer, i’m so happy for you!”

“Thanks Bow. I’m glad too, I was starting to worry that Catra was going to lose it there for a while. Having to carry me everywhere.”

“Speaking of Catra, where is she?”

“Oh, I told her to go do her thing, didn’t want to burden her more than I have to.”

For the first time in a while, Bow stared at her with the most deadpan expression he could muster.

“W-what?”

“Adora, are you kidding me?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Bow, i’m just trying to let her have some freedom, I don’t want her to feel like she owes me or something.”

“Adora. I love you, but sometimes you are so blind, it hurts.”

“What are you even talking about, Bow?”

“Adora, Catra literally carried you all the way back to Brightmoon. She stayed by your side the entire time.”

“Yeah, well someone had to do it!”

“We offered to help her, and she glared at everyone, I’m pretty she would’ve torn apart anyone who even tried to so much as breathe on you.”

“Whatever, Bow. I really don’t want to argue about that right now.”

“Okay, well where are you headed? It’s been a while since the best friend squad terrorized Brightmoon.” 

“I was actually just heading over to the garden to get some air.”

“Awesome! I’ll go grab Glimmer and we’ll meet you there!”

With that Bow ran off.

-

Catra was standing in an empty hallway, head turned around the corner, ears bent forward and focused.

“Hey Wildcat, whatcha doing?”

For a moment all of Catra froze in place. Until she realized Scorpia had snuck up on her.

“Scorpia! Keep it down, and stop sneaking up on me!”

“Sorry, sorry, I wasn’t sneaking, so I thought you would’ve heard me. My bad.”

Flustered, Catra immediately started shaking her head and hands, hoping that she didn’t upset the large woman.

“No, no, i’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”

“It’s okay Wildcat.”

Catra’s gaze fixed on the floor as the awkwardness set in. Even after they reconciled, it had been a while since they talked. All Catra had been doing for weeks is taking care of Adora.

“Soooooo, what’s got you so distracted and sneaky?”

“Nothing!” she yelped, as pink tinged her cheeks.

“You’re sneaking around the castle, and barely paying attention to your surroundings. So much that _I_ snuck up on you. Something’s up Wildcat.”

“Shhhh, okay, okay, just keep it down.”

Scorpia nodded her head and mimicked zipping her lips shut.

“Okay, so recently, Adora started being able to walk, with a walker, but you know that’s progress..” A delighted squeal immediately came from Scorpia.

“Yeah, it’s really awesome. But, since she can walk on her own now, she said I should go do my own thing. That I don’t have to take care of her all the time anymore. Can you believe that?”

“It sounds to me like she feels bad about you always being there. Like you’re sacrificing other things just to take care of her.”

“That’s ridiculous! I want to take care of her!”

“Is that all you want?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well, you know, you’ve been doing only that pretty much non stop for a few weeks now. What’re you going to do when she’s healed up?”

For the second time in the last half hour, Catra froze. 

_What am I going to do? Oh no! What am I going to do?_

Suddenly it kind of all made sense. She’d been so focused on Adora and making sure she was healthy, that she completely forgot what she’d do after that.

“Scorpia, what do I do?”

“I don’t know Wildcat, want to go spar a bit? I was going to go train, but it sounds like you need a distraction, or something else to do.”

“Y-yeah. That sounds good.”

-

Catra swiped at Scorpia rapidly, before quickly repositioning. She’d been trying to throw Scorpia off by switching up the timing and direction of her strikes, but none of it seemed to get to her. 

It was starting to frustrate her to no end. She almost always won, in training and out of it. Single combat was her forte.

*Whack*

Scorpia’s massive pincer smacked her across the torso and head. Even with Scorpia pulling her punches, Catra still skidded across the training room floor a bit.

“Oh! I’m so sorry, are you okay Catra?”

Flopping over on her back, Catra gasped for air for a moment.

“Yeah. I’m fine. Good hit Scorpia.”

“You sure you’re okay? I didn’t mean to hit you like that.”

“It’s fine, that’s how sparring works.” Now that her breathing calmed down, the worry about her skill came back. 

“How’re you so good at this?”

“What do you mean Wildcat?”

“I mean, in the Horde I was pretty much the best when it came to fighting, the only people who ever beat me were the older cadets when I was little, or Adora, and that’s because she trained all the time. What about you?”

“Oh! Uh, well, I don’t know, I was always stronger than I was quick. At first I tried to make up for it by building up my speed, but that didn’t seem to really make me much better. So I decided i’d use what I did have. Got bigger, and stronger, and learned to use my pincers more carefully.”

“Huh. Didn’t anyone make fun of you for it?”

“Hmm, sure, but they always did that. Well, until I got really good, then they stopped. I guess they realized that I could crush them like a stick or something.”

“Do you think you could teach me how to fight like that?”

“I guess? But, I think the way you fight now is pretty good for you. I have these big claws, they let me block a lot, but also hit extra hard. You can’t really do that with your claws.”

Catra visibly deflated at Scorpia’s response, instinctively curling into herself.

“Hey, that doesn’t mean we can’t figure something out. I know I couldn’t fight using speed, but you can. Not to mention you’re really nimble, so you can dodge really well, we can work on dodging, and taking hits when there’s an opening, okay?”

Scorpia’s gentle smile brought Catra back out of her thoughts.

“Yeah, I think that sounds good.”

Taking Scorpia’s reached out pincer, Catra got back to her feet, and back into position.

-

A few days into the second stage of therapy, they were in their room again. The sun painted the room orange, as it set.

Catra had been taking a nap when Adora sat down on the bed. The shake of the mattress roused her.

“Hey, Adora, how was it today?” Catra mumbled the words as she stretched out.

“Today was rough, I don’t think I can lift my arms.”

“Do you want help getting changed for bed?” 

Adora turned to her, a sheepish look on her face. “Could you?”

Catra scooted up behind her, and started pulling her shirt up. Just as she had pulled it up to her shoulders, Adora heard a sharp intake of breath.

“Catra?” Turning her head again, Adora saw a look of sheer terror on Catra’s face, as she stared at her back.

“No no no no no, you were She-Ra, no no, NO!” Catra rambled as she started clambering backwards.

_The scars! She didn’t know._

Pushing through the ache of her muscles, Adora turned around and gripped Catra’s wrist gently.

“Hey, it’s okay, Catra, we’re okay.” 

Catra yanked her hand out of Adora’s grip and curled up on the bed, hands clutching her head.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean to! You were She-Ra, they were supposed to heal! I’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry!” 

Catra curled into herself, hyperventilating as she apologies sprung forth rapidly.

Pushing herself again, Adora wrapped her arms around Catra, doing her best to gently scritch her in an effort to soothe.

The apologies stopped after a bit, replaced by wails. Adora held her through it, whispering reassurances.

The cries stopped eventually. At some point Catra had grasped Adora’s shirt desperately.

“You okay, Catra?” 

Catra shuddered beneath her. She was quiet for a moment. “I’m sorry.” Her grip tightened on Adora’s shirt.

“I thought you’d just heal, you were She-Ra, it wasn’t supposed to hurt you, i’m so sorry.”

Catra was shaking again, tears spilling forth again.

“Shhhh, it’s okay Catra, you couldn’t have known, i’m okay. They’re just scars, it’s okay.”

Slowly Catra’s arms curled around her, sliding slowly under her shirt, to her back. Gently, more gentle than Adora had ever felt her, she traced the claw scars down her back.

Adora hugged her tighter in response.

“I’m sorry.”

“Catra, it’s okay, we both did things we regret, it’s in the past now. What matters is that we’re together again, and we know better now, yeah?”

Catra didn’t respond, she just nodded her head against Adora’s chest.

“Let’s go to sleep, we can take an early shower in the morning, okay?”

Another nod, and Adora gently guided them under the covers. Normally she’d sleep on her back with Catra curled up against her side. But tonight was different.

“C-can’t I look at them?” Catra’s split gaze finally moved up from her burrowed position against her chest.

“Of course.” Adora replied, a small, soft smile crossing her features as they looked at each other.

Adora gently laid on her side, back toward Catra. It took a few seconds, but slowly, Catra pulled her shirt up to her shoulders. Looking at the scars she’d left, tracing them again. 

They spent some time like that. Until Adora peaked back over her shoulder. Their eyes meeting again.

Unexpectedly, Catra pressed herself against Adora’s back and wrapped her arms around her.

“Can we sleep like this tonight?” She whispered into Adora’s back.

Gently Adora rested her hands over Catra’s. “Of course.”

Catra’s grip tightened a bit, but soon enough she sagged. The exhaustion hitting her full force. 

-

Adora woke up in the early morning to Catra’s pained whimpers.Turning over she gently shook Catra awake. Catra’s eyes split open, panic clear in them. Adora stared at her head on and held her.

“It’s just a nightmare, we’re okay.”

Catra’s eyes focused on her, and she whispered “Not a nightmare. A memory.” She looked down immediately after.

Again her hands slid over Adora’s back. Adora’s hand drifted to her cheek in response.

“Hey.” Gently she brought Catra’s stare back up to hers. “It’s in the past now. I’m okay.”

“I know, it just hurts, to know that I did that to you. I was so angry, and I thought you’d just heal”

“I know.” Adora gently began scritching at the base of Catra’s ears. “To be honest, everyone thought they’d heal, no one really knows why those scars didn’t.”

They laid together like that for a while. Until Adora broke the silence.

“Want to go take a bath? We could use one, since I slept covered in sweat.”

“Okay.”

Their eyes met again. Adora smiled at Catra, and the small smile she got back told her they’d be okay.

-

In the following weeks Adora finally got her cast off, and had finally gotten to walking around unassisted. Which led to her “letting” Catra sleep in her own room. Even though she was pretty vocal about that not being something she cared to do.

Now that Catra had more time to herself, she started training with Scorpia more, and hanging out with Entrapta. It almost seemed like things were back to being okay. But that’s exactly what screamed that something was wrong.

It was sunset when Catra knocked on Adora’s door. 

“Come in!”

Catra quickly slid into the room and closed the door behind her. Taking in the room, she saw Adora sitting at the window, watching the sunset. The deep purple light covered her frame, and it stopped her dead in her tracks for a moment.

“Hey, Adora.”

“Hey, yourself. What’s up?”

“Just came by to check up on you, see how you’ve been doing emotionally and stuff.”

“Oh, i’m great! You know, just focused on recovery.”

As if to prove her point she flexed her arms for a second.

“Adora. You know you can talk to me, right? I want to be there for you, but you have to let me.”

Adora looked at her with a suspicious glare.

“Catra, what are you talking about? I said I was fine.”

“Yeah, well you always say you’re fine, until you aren’t.”

“Ugh, Catra i’m just focusing on my recovery, you know, like everyone’s been telling me to?”

Adora stood up, as she spoke, and started pacing.

“Adora.”

“And i’m making a lot of progress okay? I’m walking, i’m getting stronger, i’ve improved so much.”

The more she speaks the more animated Adora becomes, arms gesturing as she speaks, and gaze jumping around the room.

“Adora.”

“At the rate i’m going i’ll be back to normal in no time, and I can start helping the rebellion again, and we can get rid of Prime and make everything better.”

“ **Adora!** ”

Finally Adora stopped, staring at Catra, bewildered.

“Catra, i’m f-”

“Why are you lying to me!” Adora flinched back. “You’re doing this again. Just like last time, like always, you just say ‘i’m fine’ and ‘i’m just training’ over and over and over again! And I can’t just fucking stand around and watch you do this again Adora! I can’t watch you break again!”

Catra was shaking. With anger, with fear. Tears spilling down her cheeks as she met Adora’s shocked stare.

“I can’t do it Adora, I can’t take it anymore. You won’t talk to me, you won’t open up to anyone, and i’m so **scared.** ”

They stared at each other in silence. Until Adora’s composed mask cracked, and sobs started wracking her body.

Catra moved toward her in an instant, wrapping her in the tightest hug possible as Adora sobbed into her shoulder.

“I’m sick of trying, Catra.” Adora’s voice was harsh, cold, nothing like usual. It froze the blood in her veins.

“I’m so sick of trying. That’s all i’ve ever done. I tried to be the best soldier, for an evil army that betrayed and lied to me. I tried to be the best She-Ra to fix my mistakes and fix the world, and  **again** I was betrayed and lied to. I tried Catra, I tried so hard to be a good friend, to Glimmer, and it wasn’t enough.” 

She stops for a moment, finally looking up at Catra. Meeting her gaze, and  **gods** did it hurt. To see Adora, the person who always,  **always** tried, finally give up.

“I tried to be a good friend to you. But, all I did was betray and hurt you.” Finally, after everything, after all the screaming and fighting, Catra finally got her to admit it. But instead of feeling vindicated, like she hoped, she was heartbroken. 

“I’m done trying. All it’s ever done is hurt people.” Adora’s gaze fell, her blue eyes staring vacantly at her sheets.

_ No. No no no. No!  _

Catra couldn’t bring herself to speak, her throat too tight as the tears forced their way out of her. She practically flew onto the bed to wrap her arms around Adora, as tightly as she could.

Together they cried, Adora from years of breaking herself for the sake of others. Catra for Adora.

“No.” Finally Catra could get the word out. “I’m sorry Adora, sorry that people kept using your kindness, kept abusing it. But please, this time, don’t try for them, or for Glitter, or me.”

As gently as she could, Catra lifted Adora’s chin, matching those brilliant blue eyes again.

“Try for you.” Adora's eyes widened, and she sobbed. 

They held each other for a long time. Crying together, comforting each other.

Adora would grow and heal, both physically and emotionally. She would always carry the scars of the past, but with Catra there to ground her, she would make it. They would make it.


End file.
